Michael's posts with tag: parenting

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Posted by Michael on Mar 23, '08 6:56 PM for everyone
Spent the Holy Week with my family in the beautiful and remote Batanes islands of the Philippines.  I’d like to say I’ll blog about traveling to Batanes but I still have to make good on my promise to blog about Palawan.

Got an unexpected but pleasant surprise during the trip when as we were driving out of Basco (the capital) on our way to tour the island of Batan, our tour guide remarked that we were now driving along the “Paderes Highway.”  I did a double take and our guide confirmed that I heard him right.  The locals refer to a 1 km stretch of the national highway as the “Paderes highway.”  He then pointed to a small white concrete structure along the highway which they call the “Paderes house.”

The story goes that a certain Mr. Paderes, not from Batanes, out of the goodness of his heart and using personal finances, oversaw the concretization of this portion of the national highway which used to be nothing but dirt road.  This section has to be one of the most scenic highways in the world, certainly in the Philippines.  It winds around lush mountains on one side with cliffs dropping majestically down the South China Sea on the other.  At a particular spot with a spectacular view stands the Paderes house which served as Mr. Paderes’ home during the duration of the project.  Interestingly, since the completion of the project some thirty years ago, Mr. Paderes has never been back.  But he is fondly remembered by the locals.  Every local I asked since that day knows about Mr. Paderes and his highway.

Nobody seems to know his first name nor where he is from.  I asked my geologist uncle who has done several structural projects for the government but he was equally surprised and this was the first he had ever heard of this story.  Googling didn’t produce any leads either.  The hostel owner where we stayed promised to text me his full name when she finds out.

There are few Padereses in the Philippines so he is most certainly a relative, at least I’d like to believe so.  It’s good to know that a distant relative somehow found it in his heart to undertake a project out of his own pocket that has benefited thousands of Ivatans (Batanes locals) only to disappear into anonymity.  Few outside Batanes may have heard of him but he is deeply remembered and appreciated in this remote island.

My connection to him may be very loose but I am proud that a namesake has left such a legacy to a precious people in one of the most beautiful islands of the Philippines.  May we all live our lives in a way that honors God, blesses others, and leaves a wonderful legacy and example for our children.


Posted by Michael on Oct 22, '07 9:41 PM for everyone
I had a major Eureka! moment at the Global Leadership Summit* which I attended over the weekend.  The summit was well into its middle stages when I noticed a significant trend in the lives of all four high profile world leaders who were interviewed - each one of them, without fail, credited their parents for the persons and leaders they became.  
I picked up a lot of good, solid, leadership lessons but what inspired me the most was the fact that the singlemost common denominator of every one of these leaders is good parenting. It certainly was not the intended point of the summit and no one ever referred to it.  But it was so glaring to me.  These great leaders had different styles, experiences, and lessons to impart but they were all deeply influenced by their parents’ decisions early in their lives.  Let me share with you some of the valuable lessons I learned.

• Colin Powell
Colin Powell credited his parents for instilling two things in him which drove him to excel:
1. Expectations – though he grew up poor and in the Bronx, it was expected that he would make something of his life.  His parents did not get on banana boats from Jamaica to migrate to the US and work long hours just for him to throw away his life. Didn’t matter if he didn’t want to go to school or college, he was going anyway.  End of discussion.  
2. A Sense of Shame – the worst punishment for doing something bad was to be told he shamed the family.  He preferred that his father beat him up than to be told he had shamed the family.
In a separate interview, Colin Powell said of his parents…
“They're very important in our lives -- my sister's life and mine -- for the love they gave us, for the structure they provided and just for the inspiration that they gave to us, in the way they lived their lives.
I've told many, many audiences of both parents and young people, but mostly parents -- children don't listen to what you tell them, they don't listen to the lectures. What they really respond to, what they really do, is watch how you live your life, watch how you exercise your values. If they see worth in that, if they see merit in the way you are living your life, that's what influences children.
I saw a great merit in the way my parents lived their lives, and I never wished to displease them. I always wanted them to be proud of me. The worst days of my life were not when I got a spanking, but when I did something that disappointed my mother and my father.”

Colin Powell was the US Secretary of State from 2001 to 2005 and Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff from 1989 to 1993.

• Richard Curtis
When asked by Bill Hybels how he developed a burden for the poor, aside from having visited Africa, he mentioned that as a boy, he lived in the Philippines for three years and saw poverty first hand.  He then said that one Christmas, his parents decided to forego all the gift-giving, and instead, gave the money they were going to spend on gifts that year to the poor.  That had a profound impact on him.  Today, though a screenwriter, producer, and director by profession, his personal passion is to eradicate extreme poverty around the world.  He has used his craft and influence to found and co-found Make Poverty History, Live 8, and Comic Relief.
Richard Curtis is the award winning filmmaker behind Mr. Bean and Four Weddings and a Funeral.  He has raised hundreds of millions of dollars towards eradicating poverty.

• Jimmy Carter
This was one of the most fascinating.  Before him, nobody in his family had graduated from high school.  But early on, his father entrusted him with great responsibility.
At age 5, his father got him started on a small peanut business.  He would pick peanuts from their farm, sort them out, and take them to the local store everyday to sell.  His daily profit was equal to a grown man’s daily wages.  From his peanut earnings, at age 8 or 9, his father asked him if he wanted to invest his peanut savings in cotton.  Little Jimmy did and made quite a profit.  At age 12, he invested his cotton money in a few rental homes (!) and lived off the rental until he enrolled in Annapolis.  At each stage, his father allowed him to make the decision himself.
Jimmy Carter was the 39th President of the United States and received the Nobel Peace Prize in 2002.

• Carly Fiorina
This is one of my favorites.  She said that she was “not a gifted child.” Other kids were smarter, more talented, more athletic, etc.  “But,” she continued, “my parents were a gift to me.” That said it all for me.
Carly Fiorina was the President and CEO of Hewlett Packard from 1999 to 2005.

Here’s the clincher.  Bill Hybels capped the entire summit with a message on inspiring leadership. Guess how he chose to drive his point home?  Through a video which is the true story of Patrick Henry Hughes who was born blind and crippled.  But his parents realized at age two that he had an extraordinary gift of music.  So his father took a midnight shift, working from 11pm to 6am, would get back home and sleep until 11am, and then start the day with Patrick nurturing his gift and getting him through regular school.  Everyday.  For years.  Until today.  Patrick is now an accomplished musician.  The Hughes are solid Christians.  Click here to see the video and be inspired.

Parents, we are God’s gift to our children.  They are our greatest stewardship.  If we just lead them in the ways of the Lord, be present in their lives, be available to them, and set a godly example, we can change the world in one generation.  Guaranteed.

*The GLS is an annual leadership summit in the US organized and hosted by Pastor Bill Hybels of Willow Creek Association.  It brings together some of the world’s most influential leaders via videocast. This year, it was shown in 193 cities in 31 countries.



Posted by Michael on Oct 22, '07 9:25 PM for everyone
If you need a shot in the arm, watch this video. Patrick Henry Hughes was born blind and crippled. But by the grace of God, and the devotion of his father, he took responsibility for his life and made no excuses. He is now an accomplished musician and about to graduate from university. It is as much about fatherhood as it is Patrick Henry's courage and faith. Dedicated to all parents.


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